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As we turn our focus to creativity, I am so pleased to present Valerie Nifora’s guest post on what prevents people from following their dreams. Valerie is the author of, I Asked the Wind: A Collection of Romantic Poetry. I hope you enjoy. Please share your thoughts in the comments.
I was tapping my pencil and staring out the window when a question someone asked me recently kept repeating in my head. She wanted to know what prevents people from following their dreams of becoming an author?
Thinking hard about this question, the easy answers are:
- lack of motivation,
- not knowing how to start,
- not having enough resources, or
- required expertise.
But, what I think it boils down to is one-word fear — fear of failure (granted), but more subtle is fear of success.
WHERE DO DREAMS BEGIN?
I can speak from my own experience, that it was my dream to be a published author. It all started in fourth grade when my teacher had us write a story and then bind it in a book. (My mother has it in a drawer somewhere where she keeps these things like most mothers.) Something very magical happened that day that carried in my heart quietly for about four decades.
Oh, to be a published author with my name on the spine! I visualized that a lot and often. I would start and stop query letters. I would start and stop (and sometimes loose) manuscripts. And I would take every failed attempt because who among us isn’t used to failure?
Failure is a familiar friend. It sits next to you with one arm around your shoulder hovering between, “I told you so,” and “At least you tried.”
But success? Goodness! Success is the popular girl at the party, and everyone wants to talk to her. Who wants that pressure?
THE TRUTH ABOUT SUCCESS
If we really think about it, many of us feel that success will change us or change our lives or make things different. So isn’t it easier not to bother? If you’re successful in achieving your dream well, then you’re accountable for it now. You own it. It’s yours.
But here’s the part that I didn’t realize — doing the thing you dream about, actually doing it — even in small measures is enormously gratifying. If you don’t worry about succeeding at it (Not sure I’ll ever make NY Times Best Seller or Poet Laureate), somehow it comes. And it doesn’t matter how successful whatever your dream is — the joy of using your talents fulfills itself!
So, I’m not sure what your dream is (big or small) go ahead and give it a go. And even if you can’t do it on a big scale and you have to do it “small,” so what — you did it. Stop worrying and just do it. The world will thank you for it.